After a bit of staring, some pondering and little fiddling around, I came up with a highly complex process to create something fabulous that would last longer than the time it takes me to eat a cupcake (i.e. about thirty seconds). Ladies and gentlemen, flex your fingers please, it's the paper doily garland tutorial!
Now, you're going to have to pay attention to this one, as it can be tricky to follow all the steps.
1. Gather your materials.
You could use any doilies really, plain or patterned, and you can find a gazillion of the little blighters on eBay (look at these ones! Look at those colours!). To string them up, I used bakers twine from Papermash, but if you don't have any, crochet cotton would work just as well - I just prefer the look of bakers twine. Apart from that, you need some glue - I used spray mount, because it was at the front of the cupboard, and it's quick, but any kind of glue would work.
2. Measure the space you want to hang your garland in.
Obviously, the length of your twine depends on how much of a dip you want your garland to have. Cut your twine to the required length.
3. Prepare your doilies.
Lay out your length of twine, and work out how many doilies will fit along it, and what order you want them to sit in.
4. Fold your doilies in half and glue them down.
Make sure you don't glue them too far up - you're aiming to just get the edges to stick together. (The further up you glue, the harder it'll be to thread them afterwards.
5. Thread onto the twine or string.
You might find you have to use a wool or tapestry needle if it gets caught up inside the doily.
6. Hang up.
Erm, that's pretty much it. It's not exactly ground-breaking craft work, but it's a) quick b) easy and let's face it, who doesn't love a garland around the house?